Boiling Frog Syndrome

THE BOILING FROG SYNDROME..!!

Human Beings and frogs are the two creatures in nature who have tremendous power to adjust...
Put a frog in a vessel of water and start heating the water...

As the temperature of the water rises, the frog is able to adjust its body temperature accordingly...
The frog keeps on adjusting with increase in temperature...
Just when the water is about to reach boiling point, the frog is not able to adjust anymore...
At that point the frog decides to jump out...
The frog tries to jump but is unable to do so, because it lost all its strength in adjusting with the water temperature...
Very soon the frog dies. What killed the frog?
Many of us would say the boiling water...
But the truth is what killed the frog was its own inability to decide when it had to jump out...
We all need to adjust with people and situations, but we need to be sure when we need to adjust and when we need to confront / face...
There are times when we need to face the situation and take the appropriate action...
If we allow people to exploit us physically, mentally, emotionally or financially, they will continue to do so...
We have to decide when to jump...
Let us jump while we still have the strength !!
Think about It !!
I love dis msg!!
Its so true for most of us...

Role of Faith in Success

 The role of spirituality in your professional Success.

How do we attain it? 

Tips to weave your faith in your aspirations:

 Go in Search of the Golden Fleece!

Step 1. Be Clear of you want. Be specific. Use singular words. Define One Parameter. Refine your thoughts to the bare minimum.
Step 2. Now, Wait.
 The game of Faith has begun. The nature, universe and God will play with your Asking now. You will tempted to add IF's and Buts to your wish. You will start reconsidering. Its a game of universal forces. They will throw temptations at you. They will create apprehensions in your heart. They will create sense of urgency. They will divert your attention to Exceptions.
Don't deter! Stick to your Wish. Your asking. Your prayer.
This is where most people fail. This is where most people give in. This is where the conscious mind will try to overcome subconscious mind. This is where sensible people will bring in their sensibility. This is where we start forgetting our SINGULAR words and start adding ANDs and PROVIDED.
But remember, the battle conquered here, will be the battle worth winning. Stick to one parameter. One word. And you will get it.
Because this will.. just be a start. After a small win, you will find the second win easier. And as the time will progress, you will get the practice of doing it.

STEP 3. The key lies in sticking to your Asking, just stick to it. Dont accept anything more or anything less. Till the time your wish comes true, you would have to wait it out. You would have to be extremely patient. You will have to show courage and faith in God.

Thieves of Faith
Fear:  Fear is the biggest enemy of Faith. To the extent where it majorly wins. It does, always. So, have no room for fear.
For eg, in your asking to God, you have asked for one parameter and thats :  you need a Job which pays you $100K . Now, suddenly your ex employer gives you a call and offers you $100K. And you start getting thoughts like...How can I go to the same job back again. What if I am still dissatisfied? What if the same other problems arise? etc. If you get all this sensible objections in your mind...that means you have Fear.
Remember, you asked for just one parameter? You got it, right? Now, just Grab it!
 If you ask me now, " what if I am dissatisfied again?". I will tell you, You just achieved one milestone with your faith. Accept the offer. Join the Job. And on your first day, ask God, I want to be most satisfied with my Job. And leave it at that. The whole day, and days in a row. Just stick to your asking and that will be, I want to be most satisfied with my Job. Repeat the two steps mentioned above. You will feel feel immensely confident. You will get a complete balance of sensitivity, where you need to say what ...to your Boss and do what... with your time.

Many:  Another Anti-Prayer word is Many. We live in a world full of responsibilities. Our success is not just defined by professional angle but personal too.
We can be tempted to fixing ourselves against parenting Goals, social Goals, Health Goals, career goals etc all at the same time. Its very very tempting.
A mountain like courage is required to hold our aspirations and just stick to one. Its very difficult. Because there's no time limit. We are not talking of weekly goals or monthly goals. WE are talking of Faith. The people with stronger faith will achieve faster results and thus can achieve many in a month(one at a time). But the step 2 mentioned above plays its tricks. It can delay your achievement and thus keep you deprived of one part of your life.
But thats the rule of the game. One wish at a time. You will be meddling with the science of faith if, even by mistake, you focus on more than one asking. All efforts will be jumbled up and it will lead you nowhere. You might have to start the whole process again. It will then require much more faith. Phew!

The keyword here is SUCCESS
You don't want to be the child of the God, praying hard, doing the good Karma and still struggling.
 
Yes, I know success isn't everything, but come on! Isn't the Faith in God suppose to make you emerge stronger?

Am I Immature?

What’s Maturity?

Maturity is a sense of understanding where you are able to decide for yourselves what’s best in your situation.

We, as humans have needs. Social needs, physical needs, spiritual needs, emotional needs etc.
The ability to build a structure in life to fulfill our needs optimally is Maturity.

I will call it absolutely Immature to give in to the Status Quo or any sort of Obligations.

Immature people don't have Guts. They are like a Football to their own apprehensions. They move their concern on a scale of more or less depending on their convenience.
Whereas Mature people sit and assess their needs. Acknowledge them and try and form a structure around it. 

Immature people can’t decide for themselves what suit them the best. They are overly worried for someone; they are full of fear of being judged or being cut off from a social circle etc.

Mature people, on the other hand, seek the concerned people. Clarify, remove any buds of misunderstanding and push ahead their sense of maturity...

Immature people use the language of, "MY way or Highway" without explanation. Mature people are verbose. They try to convince and justify.
 Immature people have a superiority complex. They have an attitude that they know what’s best for others and they can decide for others. And as if this wasn't enough, after doing it, they want others to follow their authority. Mature people think whats best for them and how it can be best suited in the situation. They seek others involved only to create a supportive environment.

Mature people never play the dirty game of politics. They take the battle head on. They can be sought. They talk. They clarify.

They care a heck about how the world perceives them. Coz if they care enough, they seek the world and make them hear their end of the story. They will do this only and only when they deem it fit in the situation.


Maturity is not related to age. It’s related to realization. It’s about clarity. It’s about foreseeing. It’s about identifying yourself with something bigger than you. And that thing will be your priority. Everything else will take a backseat.  It’s about thinking of you as a part of a whole.
Majorly, it’s about being in charge to decide what’s best for you.....

JUST DO IT !!!!!!!!!!

Do you have any area or parameter where you haven't succeeded yet? or maybe not proven yourself yet?
Not just to move ahead of the Pack but even to JUST survive....You need to know this.
All you need is...

1. a small success
2. a small recognition
3. a highlight on your potential
4. a Baby step

A word of praise:

For a Beginner-Artist who's overwhelmed by so much of Practice the art demands...little words of praise by his mentor...boosts his confidence and then the Art becomes his passion.
Its only when the Beginner starts believing that HE HAS IT...He then starts refining his homework and paying a sincere attention in his class.
After which his art starts speaking his personality. His emotions get weaved in his art seamlessly.

A small recognition:

 

I studied in English medium Co-ed school but was never fluent in spoken English. I used to write, understand the language but ‘talking in English’ used to Zip my lips.

It was not until I delivered a speech on stage followed by a loud applause. At that time,  I started believing that I can do it. All by myself, without anyone’s direction.

Since then the journey is ON, till now I fumble. But I am progressing. My daughter’s schooling is a refresh button for me.

I have never been bogged down since, even after I have failed miserably by shifting to Bangalore and discovering that the English I had learnt in fact was full of artificial accent and wrong pronunciation. I caught up. I progressed. I adapted.

It all started when I experienced the loud applause, I was standing on stage and all the eyes were lit. 

A highlight on your potential

 

In Master-chef Reality show, when you get chosen for it….. you jump. You are joyous. You are elated.

You yell aloud: I am gonna be the next Master chef.

You enter the kitchen and start cooking.

You cook with all your Brains and soul.

You try and bring out all your cards on the table.

But ONLY when you experience the WOW response from judges, you feel confident. Till then you had been talking to yourself, thinking on your own, reminding yourself the reason you are there in the kitchen…

When you experience the acknowledgement from the judges, all these talks Stop! And you just focus on your performance.

A little recognition for your skill set helps you shine through.

A Baby step

What does a Baby step imply?

It implies …..

                     ……….Action

You might have been right throughout;

You would have made a complete sense.

Your voice might carry complete sincerity and honesty.

But …

If you wait for approvals, few Nods, understanding, attention, sympathy, empathy,

Nothing of above would be achieved.

To get that small success to get you going, all you need is-  action.

A baby step.

If you have a problem in relationship, stop talking…take the baby step. Stop tolerating what you shouldn’t.

If you think, as a married couple, you need to spend more time, Stop thinking about it. Take a baby step. Arrange a babysitter for your kids, book the show and go watch it.

If you think, you are facing friction with your Boss, don’t analyze. Take your stand by streamlining the process of delivering results your way. And then, that’s it. Be ready for comments and criticism but be your way. You don’t need an hour long discussion with your Boss for it. Let him detangle the threads of your changed way, attitude or style.

Just Focus on Your way, Your Performance.

If you think you are been treated with Bias, Partiality or humiliation….acknowledge it as Your Failure……..

                     ……… instead of others.

Act on it. Make yourself worthy of respect and equal treatment. Seek people who are welcoming to you. Stop spending time with people who would leave you when you are sick. Surround yourself with people who will value you, for what you are and are doing with your own life. Be with people who make you feel worthy of unconditional love and respect.

A Baby step…….is all it requires!

What is Self Respect?

What is Self Respect?

Not caring about clarifying yourself each time is self respect.

Shutting up when someone doesn't let you make a point, inspite of you lending a patient hearing to them, is self respect.

Ignoring a source of constant nuisance and, increasing your tolerance level in that regard,  is self respect.

Raising your head high and smiling each time a challenge occurs is self respect.

Walking off when the conversation is about to turn ugly is self respect.

Caring a heck about the world when it comes down to doing what is right is self respect.

Letting go of companionship and being alone at times is self respect.

Feeling the power within yourself that you need not succumb to the same status quo and thereby feel pity on yourself. is self respect.

Self Respect is a feeling which comes when you take charge of your own emotions. Hold yourself up and feel happy. Feel that life is under control. And you can do it. You can survive, rise up and lead.....

Be yourself

So you believe in confrontation. And yet you wonder why things are not working out.
You console yourself by telling, atleast I am not a hypocrite.
Either this or.......
You are philosophical.  You believe in your values and you think you are taking a high road. You try to be an example for others by suppressing your emotions or letting them go of their misbehaviour.

Whatever the case, you are still wondering, why things are not working out.
Well, the point is you are proud of being yourself. You just need to find the solution of your problems, which apparently keep recurring.

Its time you realize, theres nothing wrong in being yourself. You just need to be politically correct.

How do u do that? Read along.......


Politics in Relationships, Sounds scary, Right?
Well, it isn't so. Not as much as U might think.
Actually, relationships....- be it friendship, marriage,  co-workers etc...is full of politics.
No Matter how much you evade the existence, the fact of the matter is-it exists.
 So if ever you want to enrich your relationship quotient, just follow some rules:

1. Feel successful. Its the best way to send signals you are influential.
    
2. Be modest yet make tough calls. If you feel, someone's bothering you, don't shy away from secluding yourself with his companionship. Master an art of doing it. For eg, the other person happens to wish you good morning, just revert back by tellling, "Uh Oh! I didnt notice you, good morning".

3. Never be detailed. Don't lay your burden of getting understood on others. The only one person who can understand you is you yourself. Let it be on that.

4. Time of Crisis: Don't be quiet. Seek, speak out, explain, elaborate, assert, do whatever but give yourself a platform. Life won't come to you ask you your say, sometimes, and MIND WELL only sometimes, you have to make it clear to the world your say. Now, upon this how other will react is up-to them. But you shouldn't have any regrets in your life.

5. Yet, again, remember, people change. They change. I was a smug myself until I was introduced to the word itself, but now i am not. I am ready to tread cautiously. Likewise, people exhibit behaviour out of their own ignorance, insecurity and upbringing.

6. Life is full of knowledge. Knowledgeable, motivated and hard working people often land up having a content lifestyle.
So take this Blog as a drop of knowledge.
Motivate yourself to try these tricks in relationships
and work hard to make things happen.

The Best way to Handle Disrespect

Step 1: Don't Ignore it!

Irrespective of what others have to say. Just DON'T ignore it. Accept and acknowledge to your self that you have been disrespected by someone.

The best way to handle disrespect is to handle your own perception of the situation. The moment you would realize that you deserve to be treated fairly and in a respectful way, you would be sending convincing signals to all the people around that you respect yourself. And you do it irrespective of your mistakes, deeds, flaws, doubts, ...YOU RESPECT YOURSELF.

Other alternatives to handle disrespect:
Take a High Road: 
It is easy to Shirk away the experience or situation by thinking that its not related to you at all. The cause of the disrespect can be anything like;

• Their misunderstanding towards you
• Their own Bias towards you
• Their own lack of education or sensibility to handle the disagreement
• Their political agenda
• Their Age

ETC.

If you take a high road would you survive the series of these experiences called DISRESPECT or INSULT coming from different sources?
The answer is No. You should not tackle Disrespect on a HIGH Road basis. Instead accept and acknowledge bravely and maturely that you have been disrespected.

Believe me, I have been having the High Road way of handling disrespect and what came my way is a
Silent embarrassment of my own self,
a subtle programming of my self  as I am the one who is entitled to such insult, abuse or disrespect
A subtle questioning to my own soul: Am I suppose to take all of this?

I personally don't think taking a High Road is a solution to handle disrespect.

Instead:
Stand Up!
Say NO to disrespect!
Don't Ignore!
Be in Charge!

By being in charge doesn't mean that insulting others back. But it does mean, refuse to be treated in a disrespectful way. Be it a child, adult, elderly....

• Walk off.
• Talk Back
• Discuss
• Debate (don't argue).
• Never say Sorry just to calm down the situation.
• Just don't give in.

And the final most important thing, don' t judge yourself. You might have done something which would have been wrong, kiddish or bullish. But we are humans.
Unless and until you did it deliberately, on purpose, you don't deserve this.
Any relationship, status, job, profile, situation, circumstance doesn't qualify you to be treated in a disrespectful way.

An understanding of this fact of the matter will relieve lot of tensions.

• You are Imperfect. But you deserve to be loved. You have flaws that need to be corrected, as the others may say. But you still are lovable. 

• You might have done something which was not up to the mark. Yet, you carry self respect. 
• You might have conducted yourself in a disapproving manner in society but that's what you are. You did the best.

 I would like to repeat: Unless and Until you did it on purpose, nothing qualifies you to be treated in a disrespectful manner.